Comfortably Numb…..

img_3796-1As the evening starts to settle down the ache inside of me once again builds up in my chest. There’s so much pressure in my head. My heart has a pain so deep that it literally aches from being ripped out over and over again. My pulse is awfully fast and I start feeling very anxious. My soul is beaten down. At night I sometimes cry. Ok, I’ve cried too goddamn much. I have shed plenty of painstaking tears that no one else even knows about. I’ve been in the shower, on the porch, sitting on my stairs in the middle of the night and in my bed for days on end. Other days have gone by, months too and none. It is going on two years. The best way to describe it, it feels like a hard punch in the stomach. I can’t explain what triggers all of those…

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